Swamped

I. Am. So. Tired. I was supposed to take my daily nap but didn't because Terrence needed me to come in and close with him. I met this man who I seriously thought was gay, but he had a decent looking Asian girlfriend that he met on eHarmony. How weird! I really wanna try eHarmony just because I'm so sure that I won't be able to find someone and I can tell the whole world dating sites don't really work. I don't think the best dating site in the whole world could help me out. The amazing guys, the ones who can stimulate my mind and keep my interest, are unavailable, so there's really no hope out there. Mimi asked me the other day if I still missed ****. I said yes, and she was really surprised because I haven't mentioned him at all for the last couple months. I compare a lot of guys I meet to him and realize that I shouldn't have taken things for granted. Anyways. Moving on. It was so dead tonight. There was a point where our goal was $1,440 and we had $1,424 in. All we needed was $16 to make plan, but we were freaking out because no one was coming into the store at all. Luckily a guy came in and got a $40 jacket right before we closed the doors, so we made plan and LY after all. I have a bunch of homework to get to. If I didn't love my coworkers and what I do so much, I definitely would have quit a long time ago because my mind and body just aren't cut out for this schedule.

Sleep Deprived

Promised my parents I'd actually wake up early to go eat with them, so I was up at 8 on a Sunday that I had off. Went to Fry's after breakfast and was on our way to whatever our next destination was going to be when Brianna called and asked me to cover for her since she had had a rough night. Luckily I had decided to throw on an Ecko tank in the morning or else I would've had to go all the way home to change and then go all the way back to my work. I was glad to trade shifts since I didn't want to close tomorrow, but what sucked was that I had left all my homework for today since I wasn't scheduled to work yesterday or today. Super busy for the majority of the time. I love working with Brittany, Davina, and Liz. We have so much fun and make hella bank whenever we're together. We've made plan and LY, beaten our forecast for the week, and had over $50 DPTs both yesterday and today. That's crazy good, especially considering that Eddie and Terrence had the whole weekend off. Don't know if I blogged about it yet, but the man that came in last time asking me to be his girlfriend came in again today. My blood curled when I saw him. It was so weird. He kept asking me if I remembered him and I pretended like I didn't, so he left since there were a lot of people in the store. He came back an hour later when there wasn't a single customer in the store and my managers were in the back and seemed really offended that I didn't remember him. I said that I saw a lot of faces and couldn't remember everyone, even though I'm actually really good with faces. Instead of asking "Will you be my girlfriend?" he basically told me to be 'cause he said "So what do you say? Be my girlfriend." It was so disgusting. Usually I'm really nice and play it off so that their feelings won't get hurt, but it pissed me off that he thought he was so hot and worthy enough of me. It was insulting actually, so I said "Look, this is a retail store. You can't just come in here trying to get my number. I'm trying to sell, not get hit on" so he said "Okay thank you" and walked out. It was creepy 'cause I found out that the reason why he was able to catch me when there was absolutely no one else in the store was because he has been standing outside the entire hour. Ew I'm so disgusted right now. Aside from that the night went well. Hooked Brittany up with this guy who came into the store that she was too shy to hit on. She said she didn't like his mouth, but I said no worries since she won't be able to see his mouth when he's hitting it from the back. She asked me what kind of grades I got, and when I told her I actually did pretty well in school she said she would've never guessed. She refused to believe me when she asked me what rank I was and I said 4th. Apparently I can't be smart with the way I look and talk. Speaking of school, I really really really need to do homework. F it, I'll just wake up at 3am to do it 'cause I can barely even keep my eyes open to finish this blog.

Hello I'll blog when I'm not so damn tired all the time

Swollen Fingers

It's been barely a week of school and I already feel like I've done so much work. My fingers are already swelling up; I even took off my acrylic nails to make my nails shorter because the way I write involved my thumbnail pushing into my finger. It still hurts like a biatch though. Basically getting my education on is all I've been doing. I went to get Thai food the other day and that was basically it until today. Amy was here for a while, and then Terrence called me out of nowhere to come in and close with him even though I wasn't even on-call. When he saw me he stopped and said "Whoa, nice dress buddy. You're gonna get me in trouble." Then he asked me five minutes later if he ever made me feel uncomfortable, which I said no to because he doesn't. He said that Eddie thought I was feeling uncomfortable with Terrence. The thing I dislike about where I work is that people think and talk too much. When I first worked there, they immediately asumed that I was on Terrence's dick and he was trying to holler at me right away, but I understand why they would since we're the only Asians working there. It went beyond that though when he told me that Eddie and Brittany say stuff like "Why does she take a long time to come in when we ask her to, but she'll come in right away whenever Terrence calls her?" Seriously guys? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Sorry I happen to have no makeup on whenever you guys call me and sorry I happen to be ready already whenever Terrence calls me. Pure coincidence and you somehow twist that into me wanting Terrence? Anyways, Mark and his friends came in to visit me. That's pretty much it. Nothing exciting today. Homework time. Guess I'm sleeping at 2 again.

Hi I'll blog when I have time

Irvine Park

Took forever to upload pictures to my Myspace, so I didn't sleep early enough to volunteer in the morning at Quaker Gardens. Mark had been calling me for the past week, telling me that he wanted to see me sometime before I went back to school. He actually came into the store yesterday for a good 20mins with one of his friends and was mad because I didn't say hi to him. I seriously didn't even see him though. Since I was only helping with floorset and wasn't actually on the clock, I wasn't required to pay any attention to the customers, so I guess he got mad because he thought I was ignoring him on purpose. I went to Quaker Gardens to talk to Leeann in person about why I hadn't been there much this summer, and she was really nice about it and said she understood. Mark came to pick me up when I was done, and he wanted to go to the park so we stopped by his house to get a blanket to lay on. I wanted to go to Mile Square Park but he insisted on driving 45 minutes to Irvine Park. It was so nice there. It's an upper class area, so there were big houses and expensive cars all over the place. There was barely anyone at the park when we got there, so we drove around to look at the peacocks, squirrels, lizards, and horses that were in one of the areas at the park. We found some shade to lay under and it was so calming to just talk and relax. Even though there are a lot of things I dislike about Mark, I still enjoy hanging out with him just because he's laidback like I am. I've always wanted to lay out in the park, but no one ever wanted to do that with me. I kept making fun of Mark's situation. It's so easy to laugh at him! But on a serious note, I feel bad for him 'cause I know he's not ready for everything that's in store for him. He didn't even wanna be with that girl, but he had to ask her out since she got pregnant. He keeps telling me how much he likes me and how much he knows he fucked up 'cause I never kiss him back. We were there for a few hours and I didn't want to ever leave because that's the last time I'll be stress-free for a very, very, very long time. After today comes school, loads of homework, endless scholarship and college applications, volunteer hours, and stepping up my game at work. At least it'll all be worth it in the end, right?

Floorset

- Yesterday
Planned to get some rest all day, but my mom came home early so we ended up going to Wal-Mart, the optometrist's office, and then El Torito. We each got five tacos and they were so yummy! My mom actually liked them, which was really out of the ordinary for her 'cause she's super loyal to the place where she always buys her burritos and usually talks down on all Mexican places besides that one. Perfect example of her loyalty: the waitress made us order drinks, so my mom ordered a margarita and made me drink most of it because her favorite margarita is the one she drinks in the Vegas casinos and therefore she can't like the one at El Torito as much as the one at the casinos. That's so weird though that each margarita has 0.5 alcohol. So if I drank two and drove, I'd legally be D.U.I.? I didn't even feel anything. 0.8 is too ridiculous of a limit. Anyways, I had planned to go to the store just to pick up my check, but my boss wanted my help with floorset so I stayed there for almost five hours marking down prices and moving stuff around. I'm really liking the new clothes. There was so much stuff I wanted to buy, like the new miniskirt and jacket and V-neck and men's shorts, but I only had enough money on me to buy a pair of skinny jeans, a tank, and a strapless top. Got home at 11. Looked at pictures. Will upload when I have time.

Sin City

- Saturday
Woke up at 4 freaking am. A couple of my guy cousins and one of my uncles came over to go in our car, and we took off at 6:15. The only time we stopped was at Barstow to get food and Starbucks. Other than that, it was a smooth ride and we got there at 11 something. The check-in line was freaking crazy! It literally extended through 3/4 of the lobby. Luckily my dad was considered a V.I.P. and was able to skip the whole line, so we got into the room and chilled there until Kathleen and her mom and her mom's boyfriend arrived. My sister asked my guy cousins who was the meaner one, and they said me because I always make fun of them. Lol! Wow I didn't know they had a brain to make decisions. When Kathleen got there, Mimi freaking knocked out for like two hours. Who goes to Vegas to sleep?! Finally we went to get something to eat, then chilled on The Strip and went to the mall. There's so many black guys in Vegas! I love it! There were even some really hot ones who checked me out throughout the weekend, which is so unusual to me because black guys around my town never ever look at me. I get scared whenever they look like they're about to approach me though. I've never talked to a hot black stranger before, so I always get really intimidated and avoid all eye contact with them. Anyways, we left the mall to go back to the hotel for dinner at Garden Grill. The hotel's getting hella smart. They used to have Casino Cafe open 24 hours, and we would go there because their food wasn't too expensive. For example, their New York steak would be about $20. Now, they only open Casino Cafe until 2 and moved their menu to Garden Grill, where the food goes for $5 to $10 more. Freaking clever! Dinner was $313. My parents paid. My aunts didn't offer. Nothing new. There was this incident where Mimi and I were standing in the restroom and the cleaning lady was doing something near the mirror and out of nowhere the huge wall mirror literally became unglued and came crashing down on the floor, barely missing everyone by inches. It was so freaking scary. After that, we went back to the room to chill before going to visit Brian, this guy I've known for a while who lives in Vegas. He asked if we wanted to play miniature golf and we stupidly said yes. We sucked so freaking much that I'm surprised Brian even had the patience to continue playing with us. The whole time we were cracking jokes and he'd just stand there and laugh at a few of them, which is something I don't like about him because I know we were being funny as hell and he must not have a very good sense of humor if he didn't find us hilarious. After Brian left, we went out on The Strip again and ended the night with McDonalds. I don't know what it is about that McDonalds that makes it so special. We always chill there when we feel like sitting back and talking. I got super sleepy since I barely slept all day, so we ended the night pretty early and went back to the hotel at 1:30am.

- Yesterday
Woke up at 7 because sleeping doesn't feel right in a city like Vegas. We all went down to Casino Cafe for breakfast and ran into Katie and her family, who ate at the same place but at a separate table. I'd much rather eat with them; they're not freaking cheap like the rest of my aunts. Breakfast was $248, which Kathleen's family paid for. Aunts didn't offer. Nothing new. Mimi, Kathleen, Katie, and I went up to the room, moved to a different floor, and then chilled in there for a couple hours. They were dancing and it was so... not pretty. We went to the mall afterwards, stuffed ourselves with pretzels and strawberry lemonade, then went shopping but didn't find anything we liked. The only thing that we did like though was #2 in Forever 21. There were these four guys working at the registers in F21. #1 was a tall Asian guy who's pretty cute but somehow reminds me of one of my cousins, which is pretty gross. #2 was this half-black, half-Filipino guy who looked just like Tyson Beckford. He was seriously one of the most gorgeous guys any of us had ever seen. #3 was white guy who wasn't my type but was still pretty good-looking. #4 was just... no. Guess which guy we got. Yep, you guessed right. We got #4. Luckily #2 asked #3 to ask #4 to ask us what race we were and was trying to talk to us, but the line was so long that we left and came back. I peeked at him at one point and saw him peeking too and almost fainted because in my mind, Tyson Beckford was looking at me. I wanted to take a picture with him just so everyone could see what someone so gorgeous looked like, but his damn manager was there and he couldn't talk to us. Bad luck follows us man. We stopped by Wynn on our way back to the hotel, then met up with the entire family to eat Thai food at Kung Fu restaurant. Dinner was $212. One of my three cheap aunts paid, which was highly surprising to me. It was 8:30 by the time we finished dinner and I was supposed to hang out with Brian at 8, so we rushed back to the hotel to get ready and met up Brian and his brother Brett at 9:30. The night before, they were in their work uniforms and didn't look too cute. This time, both were wearing fitted jeans and caps and flannels. They looked so freaking good! Can't believe we didn't take any pictures that night, but I do have some videos I recorded of them. Brian took us to Town Square, which is an outdoor mall similar to Victoria Gardens about 15 minutes away from The Strip. They had every single store I could possibly think of! Too bad they were closed. I wanted to go sightsee on the main part of The Strip but there was so much traffic that we ended up sightseeing from inside the car, which Kathleen really liked 'cause her strange ass loves traffic. Brian's other brother, Brandon, called and told us to meet him and his girl up for midnight bowling, so we went to the Braza brothers' house to wait for Brandon. Brett showed us some beats he had made and they were actually really good. I always assume people I know who do music suck just because I've met so many guys who thought they were the shit but sucked ass. Brian was supposed to dance for us but he got all shy out of nowhere. I've seen his and Brett's videos before though and they're amazing when it comes to krumping. Gotta ask Brian for them. Their nephew's really influenced by them. He's getting into dancing and can do a lot of moves that he copied from the JabbaWockeez. They're all such a cute and talented family! I wanted to stay at their house forever, but Brandon came so we all headed to The Orleans Hotel for midnight bowling. We were walking to the bowling place and Brandon looked at me, then asked Brian a question in his ear and Brian looked at me and answered "Not yet." I think they were talking about the fact that Brian and I have been attracted to each other for almost a year but we've never even held hands. Since Brian was so shy, I decided to just make the first move and give him a kiss when he got a strike. The guys hella schooled us the first game. By the second game, I was so tired that I was sleeping on Brian's shoulder. I like the way he was really affectionate and kissed my face while I was sleeping, but I kept thinking he was gonna smear my eyebrow lmao! They took us back to the hotel at 3am. My sister owed Brett a kiss on the cheek because he beat her, but he got her to kiss him on the lips somehow. I like that the Braza brothers are attracted to us and we're attracted to them, but we don't like each other that way. They got their other girls, we got our other guys. They're just people we love to hang out with when we're in town. Even though Brian and I acted like we were dating that night and he kept talking about how he's gonna try to come to Cali as soon as he can, I don't feel a connection with him, and I like that. I like that connections are so important to me now. It used to be that I would just date whoever I felt like, but now, I base potential relationships on looks and initial connection. I just realized how important comfort and humor are to me. I can't date someone if I don't feel like our silences are completely awkward-free and if I can't have some good laughs with a guy. Be good-looking and mediocre if you just want a friend in me. Be good-looking and my equal if you want a girlfriend in me.

- Today
We were supposed to leave at 6 but I woke up at 7:10, and I was the first one to wake up too. We left the hotel at 9:30 and stopped in Barstow to get Panda Express. There were so many of us in there! Kathleen and I had to sit down in these empty seats next to the Mexican family that was sitting there, and they were giving us looks like Ey chinita, who the fuck are you to sit down there? But they finally left and then we finally left. Everyone went straight home besides my parents because I made them stop at Ontario Mills for us. Didn't see anything I liked again though. So frustrating! I wanted to spend money. I went into the Ecko there and wow, it's so different from our store. So much bigger and darker and not crammed in and not pleasantful. None of us brought home stuffed animals or bought more clothes and shoes, so our mothers should be proud of us! We usually have bags and bags of stuff to take home, but this time it was just our luggage and duffel bags, which made it so much easier to unpack. Kathleen knocked out at my house, and when she woke up we over to my cousin's house for a barbecue. One of my cheap aunts bought lobster that she claimed was over $100, and the other one bought pho at a 50% off place. Not exactly equal to what the rest of the family paid in Vegas, but at least they paid something. Kathleen's mom was telling me about how the aunts had taken my grandma to Treasure Island to watch the pirate ship show, and when they got there there were so many people that they were standing in the very back and my grandma couldn't see since she's in a wheelchair. They saw security guards telling everyone to back up and they thought that they would get moved even further back, but the security guards had actually been making space in the front for my grandma and family to sit since my grandma's a handicap. Doesn't that just touch your heart? So nice. Went home at 9 and fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

Vegas Bound

Finished Animal Farm today! Weird ass ending. Worked until 10. Met my new associate manager. She's definitely not someone Eddie would typically hire lookswise, but her personality's super chill. Kay, not much to say. Time to go pack. Probably won't be getting much sleep tonight. Still gotta pack and clean a bit. We're leaving a little before 5am, which means I gotta take a nap if possible and wake up at 3am. Sigh, here goes being an insomniac for the weekend.

Senior Year Schedule

Had to wake up at 7:00 with only two hours of sleep to do my registration. Mr. Bui did a really good job giving me the classes I wanted. Amy came over later on in the afternoon to kick it, but stuff happened between her and the guy she's talking to so she's been super emo the whole day. In all the years I've known her, this is pobably the least she has spoken within a span of nine hours. Not something I'm used to at all. I wonder why I don't act like that when I break up with someone. I think I just tend to cope with things on my own rather than show the whole world that I'm sad. The world can't help me; only I and a cute guys who capture my attention can help me get over such situations. Went to Fashion Avenue and then Mainplace Mall. I got these strapless wedges, a dress I really like, and a purse. I'm officially set for Vegas now.

Schedule (Currently lacking a 3rd period):
0) English Literature AP - Hamamoto
1) Physics AP - Greer
2) Environmental Science AP - Durand
4) Calculus BC AP - PhamVu
5) Civics AP - Isselin / Economics Honors - Beglinger

Won't be an easy senior year as I had hoped, especially since I'll have to balance work and even college applications. Good luck to myself.